Seven Days on Resveratrol: Will I Wake Up Younger, Smarter, or Just Annoy My Friends?
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Ever wondered what happens when you ditch the wine, grab an unreasonably science-y tub of Resveratrol, and promise your friends you’ll be “a new person” in a week? Yeah—me neither. But here we are.
Before you scroll for a refund on the time you’re about to lose, I’ll cut to the chase:
- Resveratrol is the trendy antioxidant found in grapes (not your mate’s Pinot Grigio) and is being hyped for everything from “cellular rejuvenation” to outsmarting your dog.
- Did I get younger? Smarter? Or just more unbearable to be around?
Grab your own tub of actual Resveratrol here: nurix.uk/products/trans-resveratrol (don’t make me the only guinea pig).
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Alright. Here’s what a week on Resveratrol actually looks like. Spoiler: my face still moves, and no, I don’t smell of wine.
Day 1: The Hopeful Idiot
I mix the powder into my water and immediately feel… nothing. I stare at my face in the mirror, expecting at least a minor Marvel-style transformation. Instead, my reflection yawns back at me.
Scientific note: Resveratrol doesn’t turn you into Wolverine overnight. Annoying.
Day 2: The ‘Is It Working?’ Paranoia
I read three studies and start checking for “cellular rejuvenation” by… blinking more? I ask my partner if I look “glowier.” She says, “You look the same, but you’re more annoying.”
Benefit: High in antioxidants. Side effect: Increases risk of being unfollowed in group chats.
Day 3: Full Influencer Mode
I post a “Day 3 on Resveratrol!” story to Instagram. Zero replies, two people mute me. Apparently, my mitochondria aren’t the only thing being ignored.
Day 4: The Wellness Spiral
Add Resveratrol to a smoothie, hoping to mask my desperation with blueberries. Realise I’ve spent £6 on fruit for one drink. Now this is an expensive habit.
Scientific note: “Polyphenol” = plant compound. “Polyfaffing” = my new personality.
Day 5: Antioxidant Warrior
Convince myself I feel more “cellular energy.” Spend two hours reading about NAD⁺ and telling my friends at dinner that “wine isn’t actually a good source of Resveratrol.” Am promptly banned from choosing restaurants.
Day 6: Placebo or Power-Up?
Genuinely start feeling a bit sharper. Coincidentally, I’ve also started sleeping more, drinking more water, and texting less about mitochondria.
Benefit? Unclear. Annoyance factor? Rising.
Day 7: The Unbearable Lightness of Biohacking
Final day. I ask my friends if I seem younger.
Responses:
- “No, but you’ve definitely become that supplement person.”
- “Stop saying ‘oxidative stress’ in public.”
But secretly, I do feel good—possibly because I’ve taken control of my health, or maybe just because I’m now banned from several WhatsApp groups and finally have some peace.
Conclusion
Did Resveratrol turn me into an ageless genius? Not quite.
Did it give my cells a boost? Maybe—but more importantly, it made me pay attention to what I’m putting in my body (and how many friendships I’m willing to risk for a week of science).
If you want to join me in the biohacker’s club (no group chat required), get your own tub here:
👉 nurix.uk/products/trans-resveratrol
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Disclaimer
This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. It is not a medical product. Always consult a healthcare professional before beginning any new dietary supplement.